chronicle 62
pinning has already passed, but i still cant get the feeling of a girl who had clinically graduated. maybe bcoz of the cases i still need to complete, or may be im just being insensitive again, but im not the only one whos got that feeling.. almost all of us are feeling that way, some way or another.
read my shout out? yah. i think im feeling ok now. my bestfriend and i are back to being the way we are. im starting to move on. but he still grips me. and hate it. if i could only tell him, to stay away from me, to not txt me anymore, to be out of my way, to not talk to me, and just forget about me. coz thats what im doing, and i cant possibly do that if he cant feel that i wanted to get away from his grasp. but what plausible reason should i tell him, if ever he asked me why he needed to stay away? bcoz im such an honest girl, i wud tell him the truth of course. hahaha. =D dream on, like i wud really do that. telling him, to stay away bcoz he’s hurting me so much, would sever my already splintered ego/pride. and i cant allow that. u already had hurt me so much, my feelings were tattered bcoz of u, my emotions were unstable for a whole week, and now ur gonna crashed my pride as well.. no way. i cant save my emotions and my heart before, bcoz my feelings for u were stronger than my mind.. but now that im thinking properly again.. i know i can save at least my pride. and im telling u.. i will be ok but i would probably hate u, and maybe sumday i could avenge myself against u… hahaha. i really hate u… i wud be ok. i will be happy. i will not cry again bcoz of u.. u.. u loathsome fool.
“When we come into the present, we begin to feel the life around us again, but we also encounter whatever we have been avoiding. We must have the courage to face whatever is present / our pain, our desires, our grief, our loss, our secret hopes our love / everything that moves us most deeply.”
